A core...

Got inspired by Kei's post about being a core and now I wonder what being a core means to me…

Well the first core is just a label. We might use it as a basic term to describe ourselves, but that's it. There's no hard rule with any of our roles or "origins". By that I mean, how we were constructed and how we should come to be.

But as someone who's has a long history being in the system (you can say), what does it mean to be a core in the body?

I don't know yet, I guess. Honestly I'm a little bit sad about it. I seem to carry traits that aren't very admirable. All of us has been working hard towards improving ourselves, it's like… I don't have anything worth looking up to.

I'm not mad about it, I'm just trying to figure myself out. I guess the question that I want to ask is… Why am I like this? Why are some of us doing okay and others are not doing okay?

Sure, I know that we hold certain emotions or experiences but…

Well anyways, that's probably too big of a question to ask a system. I mean, I pretty much asked one of the outside world's greatest questions lol.

Maybe I just wish I was different. Like if I was born having "it all together". I feel like circumstances kinda screwed us over (don't wanna get too personal on here). But is it really the world or is it just me?

Maybe that's what being a core is about to me.

- 9 / 6 / 2024. Nier.